I have been through a divorce. It’s hard to adjust to being single again. Eventually, you begin to think about dating, but I suggest you take your time. Use this precious opportunity to rediscover yourself. Think of this time in your life as an adventure to explore the real you. Take a deep breath and start to rediscover your true passions.

It is a hard concept for many women to believe about themselves and think how magnificent you really are! Everyone has unique gifts so stop thinking of what you don’t like about yourself or your life. List all of your great qualities and read that list until you believe it. Examples: beautiful smile, kindness, generosity, loving, caring, etc. Allow yourself to see the shining gold within.

During and after the divorce I had the feeling of grieving, similar to that of the loss of someone. I felt the need to stay busy to keep my mind off of this stressful time. However, I allowed myself time to pamper myself.

Yes, you do deserve to do something special for yourself. It can be as simple as taking a bath or a walk, shopping or reading a book with your favourite beverage. Remember, the happier you are, the happier your family will be!

Holding onto regrets and bitterness will only keep your life from moving forward. My inner voice worked overtime with all the ‘what ifs’ and if onlys’. But it didn’t help me feel better. To move your life forward, it is important to acknowledge your feelings and to learn from your past experiences to prepare yourself for the next exciting chapter of your life. Yes, there is life after divorce.

Life after divorce usually means added responsibilities. If you are a single parent or are now the one responsible for the once shared to-do list, how do you handle it all without being totally stressed out? To start, learn to laugh more, especially at yourself. Learn to let things go and not take life so seriously, as Catherine Tyson says, Lighten-up! Learn to live in the present moment. When one is missing this moment in time, one is missing out on one’s life.

If you are with your children observe them. Cherish their smiles. Give them a hug. See the true beauty of who they are and appreciate them for being a part of your life.

To be present, no matter where you are, use all your senses to pull you back into the moment. Take time to appreciate all the beauty that already exists around you. You only have to be present to see it!

What really matters to you? Knowing your purpose, will give you a true sense of who you are and why you were put on this earth. It gives your life direction and helps you make clear and easy decisions concerning that direction. It’s your compass! Without a purpose your life is a piece of driftwood, floating endlessly in whichever direction the tide decides to take it and ending up on any beach with no will of it’s own?

When going through a divorce, your emotions can be compared to a roller coaster ride. Use this time to become reconnected to your inner awareness of who you are. Learn to sit still and quiet until you understand what emotions you are feeling. Realise that your feelings and sensations are okay, then learn to listen to what your mind and body are telling you.

First, acknowledge and accept the feelings you are having. Be gentle with yourself! Be thankful for what is working in your life right now. Do something simple like pat your pet, smell a flower or, if you are in the office, take a minute to think of a previous fun time or experience you have had that could bring a smile to your face.

Think of another time of joy or something you were passionate about in your life. Enjoy the feeling of accomplishing something with ease and less effort!

During and even after my divorce, I was often filled with doubts. I questioned myself as to what is right, what to do and how I felt. Should I or shouldn’t I? It seemed difficult to make a decision. Finally I listened to my heart. If a situation doesn’t feel right, pause or wait. By waiting you may have allowed the situation to unfold more easily without having to worry! If a decision feels good or right, usually that means you are heading in the right direction.

Next time you are in a situation where someone has asked you to help them and you are ready to say yes, yet, find yourself having doubts, take a breath or even take a step back. Pause! Thank the person for thinking of you, but let them know you will have to check your calendar and get back to them. When you do have time to think about what they want you to do, focus on how you are feeling. Do you feel some resistance to saying yes? If in a day or two you are still feeling doubtful, realise the timing might not be right for you. If it still feels right say yes.

Divorce is not easy or fun but you can make it through this time of your life by realising you WILL make it! I did and I am very happy now. So can you.