On iNews Cayman’s front page today is the sad, and oh so terrible story, of a brilliant statistics sports columnist and blogger who committed suicide on Thursday August 15^th 2013, because he was terrified of succumbing to dementia.

Martin Manley shot himself and announced it on two websites – his own sportsinreview.com site and a new one he had set up the day before he performed his terrible act – martinmanleylifeanddeath.com.

It is a heart-wrenching story and if you do log in to the second site I am sure you will be moved to tears as I was.

Should he have done it? Of course not. However, I can fully understand why he did. I cannot be a judge and rule either way. I know he was a brave and desperate man to have performed the act.

Dementia is terrible. I have witnessed it first hand – twice. Both my parents had dementia. I watched my mother, a powerful ‘take-no-prisoners’ type lady totally change. She spoke her mind and didn’t care who knew it. Most of the time what she said was right. Even when she wasn’t right she still thought she was!

She disintegrated into a lady of few words, watching television, not communicating and when you did ask her question, like who is this in a family photograph she would answer in an almost childlike voice. Interestingly, she could identify the old portraits in the photograph but not the new ones.

However, even in her last days on Earth, and these were the last words anyone can remember her saying occurred when she was laying in her bed. The television was on and she was propped up in bed watching it and not communicating with anyone. Her right hand was moving around in circles non-stop. She was in a Home and one of the lady workers there was putting clean clothes in a chest of drawers next to the television. My sister and I spoke to the lady and she started to complain about the increase in her daily duties. Mum’s voice suddenly thundered across the room as I had always remembered it.

“That’s what you get paid for!” She said. Then she returned to her silent world and within a week she died.

I first learnt of Mum’s dementia when Joan and I visited her and Dad at their home in Worthing, Sussex, England. Mum knew me but didn’t know Joan even though we had visited them both for a number of years before and after our marriage. They were both present at our wedding.

Dad remarked to me that Mum was now very forgetful and she was even forgetting to cook his dinner. Now Dad couldn’t even boil an egg properly! This must have been some hardship.

Six months after that visit I received a phone call from my sister telling me that neither Mum nor Dad could be left on their own. Dad was acting strange and walking naked up the road. He had even climbed up onto the roof of the bungalow and couldn’t get down again. He didn’t even know why he had done it but said he thought mum had told him to.

I rushed back to England and couldn’t believe the sudden deterioration in not only Mum, but also Dad. He even asked me who I was? I was so shocked. “I’m your son, Dad. Colin.” “Good heavens!” he said. “The last time I saw you, you were this high,” indicating with his hand someone 3ft tall.

Both of them got worse and worse. It was awful to see how they had become. They couldn’t near the end remember how to feed themselves

I can remember saying something to Joan to the effect that if I ever get like that she must place me in a boat and let me drift away to a watery grave. Joan shook her head.

So, yes, I can very much identify with Martin Manley. I know, however, I haven’t got his ‘guts’ to do the actual act of killing myself. And shooting oneself. So final.

A new study on dementia published by the BBC says “asking patients to identify pictures of famous people, such as Elvis Presley and Diana, Princess of Wales, may help spot early dementia, say researchers.” See http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/health-23665502

Apparently there is evidence that the currently available medications for dementia may be more beneficial if given early in the disease process. These medications can help to maintain daily function and quality of life as well as stabilise cognitive decline in some people; however, they do not help everyone and they are not a cure. Early diagnosis allows for prompt access to medications and medical attention.

Somehow I don’t find that particularly encouraging.

How many people in Cayman have been diagnosed with dementia? I don’t have any figures.

There is in Cayman The Alzheimer’s and Dementia Association of the Cayman Islands (ADACI). It was formed in April 2012. On the their website, it says it is currently going through the formalities of registering as a non-profit organisation under Section 80 of the Companies Law (2011 Revision).  ADACI has also started the process of becoming a member of Alzheimer’s. There are no activities posted for 2013 and we are now in August 2013. The last entry was November 18^th 2012.

I called the contact number and spoke to a delightful lady called Dorothy and she told me the Alzheimer’s and Dementia Association is very much alive but the webmaster of the site has become very ill and therefore no new information is up.

However, the Alzheimer’s and Dementia Support Group meets on the last Wednesday of each month at 5:30 pm in the George Town Hospital Conference Room – Hibiscus B.

For more information call 1 345 924 4170 or email:  alzheimersgroup.caymanislands@gma